Monday, 26 December 2011

Perasaan yang tidak dapat digambarkan.

Shalom readers! Hmm! Merry Christmas! :D and Happy Birthday Jesus! ^^ Hari nie baru jer sampai kat rumah. Semalam tak sambut Christmas pun. But its okay :)
Semenjak beberapa hari nie, asyik2 terfikir perkara yang sama. Nape ek asyik fikir benda tue? Bukannyer dapat kembali pon. Hmm. Macam2 bende dah ku rasakan. Hmm! Malas nak diceritakn actually. Tapi...tak henti2 plak dikenang kembali. Memori kenangan lama masih disimpan. Mane taknyer terkenang kembali. Bab emo2 ni la saye tak suke. Sensitive betol saye nie. Kalo difikirkan balik, kalo ia bukan untuk aku, buat ape nak muncul2 bende tue kat depan kite? Ape2 bende je la yang bkenaan. 
Seriously, kalo sayang tue, memang la masih sayang. Tapi... hmm..biarlah. All I can say is that's impossible. Mau pandang muke dier pun mcam terpaksa la plak. Kalo bende tue dah depan mata I nie, hati bukan main keras macam batu. Ego bukan main tinggi. =.='
Dear God, I never mean to judge anybody. I'm so sorry for  what I had done. I can't continue for I had done before 'cause I felt I don't deserve something that's better for me. Whatever it is, bless him, my friends and my family. I know life must go on. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Thursday, 15 December 2011

F r i e n d s.

Shalom readers! :) Have a nice day.

Well, fellas.. Why? Since the day I came here, he was in my mind? Hmmm...maybe I have think too much about things that had happened. Jiwa kacau sudah. I'm still wondering why?? Baru dah berbaik dulu, hati baru sudah senang. But now I still felt the guiltiness in me. I really wanna talk to him, face to face. I can't stand with the attitude. Is he really forgave me actually? I'm really think too much already. Sometimes can makes me lost focus while I'm driving, the moment I hang out with my other friends. Am I really mean or what? I know I made a mistake. People always do the mistake. But couldn't us apologize each other? Hmmm.

For me, it is better to be as friend for how long you can stand. After a year and another year, you will getting know each other and know their weaknesses and their strengths. To strengthen the relationship are to be open-minded, care each other, don't talk harsh words, don't take to ur heart every jokes that can hurt ur heart. The important thing is to be patient with whatever it takes :) That's the spirit to strengthen the friendship ♥
About getting a relationship in the friendship, i think we should think wisely :) For some reason when the relationship is ended (when we couldn't tell the reason why), please don't try to take a revenge. It's not worth it. We should appreciate someone who treat us nicely :) That's the real ♥ u have show actually. "

I really do love my best friends. They are really the best for me and a part of my life. They never be replaced.

Tuesday, 13 December 2011

new hair cut! :D

Shalom readers! My new looks >.< It looks funny for me when I do my hair cut like this. Hehe. Well, some of my friends said it suits me, I look cute. Hohoho >.< I didn't expect to hear that word from their mouth. While my mom said, I was look like when I was in 13 years old. Oh my Gucci!! Hehehe. I felt that I'm really like more younger. HAHA. But its okay. I like it anyway. I still wanna do the treatment. I'm tired straightening my hair ==' plus it did took a long time to do it. So, that's all from me today :) 
Have a great day guys :D

Sunday, 11 December 2011

Should I be alone?

Shalom readers! :) Miss to share the feelings here. Hmm.. I've been looking into myself, people judge me, how they treat me. I felt that I'm useless :( I bring nothing to this world. I can't be someone which people want me to be unless I want to. Some people ignore me, treat me rudely, didn't care much about what I say. Maybe because I'm small, I don't talk loud, I don't know how to treat/appreciate people. But, why can't they teach me how it should be? Sometimes I hate myself. I hate the way of I am. It seems that I had made a lot of mistake.. There's one person still can't forgave me :'( I don't know what is the biggest mistake I had made. I already did what I should done but it seems useless for me. I felt so bad about myself. I don't know whether my friends do understand me. 
I'm also a human being. I got feelings too. I just need someone to listen and understand me. If ya can't, it's okay just please....don't ignore me :( I'm still alive and standing in front of your face. I'm not ghost which you can't see me. Sometimes I'm very disappointed. No one want have time with me when I need someone most. Oh my! Maybe I'm too sensitive with the surroundings. The person that I talked about just now. From what I saw, that person easy to ask apologize and even begging for it. While before that person been mad so much towards me. I don't know what is the intention that person might gonna do. To make me hate? 
Am I really a bad person? I'm just a weak girl which can ruin anything for certain times. But I didn't meant it. I  just did made a mistake. Every time I remember back what had happened, I felt I don't want to meet anyone and just keep the door shut all the time. I feel so down when the world is pointing on me. I'm not that brilliant, intelligence, good looking person and so on like the others. Sometimes, I just need time to pull up myself back. But some people won't allow me to have my own time. I can't make any wise decision. At the end, I'm the one who is hurt a lot and felt guilty a lot even though thousand of apologize have been made. Who I am actually in their eyes? I'm not a small kids anymore. I have think a lot. I can take care of myself.
Seems that there's no more space for myself . . . . . . . 

Thursday, 8 December 2011

I'm P R O U D of myself :)

This picture was taken when I perform on public at Highland Seafood Restaurant. Oh my! ==' 
The nerves caught my feet cold! But.. I did good..just a little mistake which I forgot the steps which one goes first. Actually, I wanna upload the video which was taken by someone (not really know that person actually). But the size was too big to upload. Never mind. Just to gain experience :)