I'm not N A I V E .

It is cold night tonight. :) Shalom readers! Have a bless day anyway.

Hmm. Saye tak pasti ape akan saye bicarakan di sini. Not really about the title but still got the connections. :)

Today is the 3rd day for 2012. Not much happened, still got the normal things. Fikiran selalu melayang. Driving tak stabil. Jiwa kacau. =/ Cuaca hari nie pun ikut mood macam saye. 

Mungkin saat nie hati yang belum dapat terima tentang ape yang telah terjadi. I didn't blame anyone. I admit my mistake and I know anyone can make mistakes. Nobody's perfect in this world. It's just more than words to say. This girl is totally in dilemma. She's Gone. 

Naa~ I'm too emotional. =P So what anyway? Everyone has the heart to feel something and so do I. I wish I could capture my own picture. The way I walk, cried, laugh, gloomy, sorrow, happy, sad and so much more. But! How can I take my own picture?? You know, I know bah =P

I always talk something that can make me laugh so that I could forget the things even just a minute :)

My FRIENDS are my medicine actually. When I see their faces, I'm speechless. No tears, just happiness.  

I have think about it all over again. One time by another. Non-stop thinking about it actually.

*i can't get it away out of my mind**

So, let's time heals every things (*i always encourage myself with those words but sometimes i can't..) but I know that God always hear me =') He won't disappoint me. I know that. He will make anything to gain back my spirit. To tell ya the truth, before I knew about everything. I admit that he is a nice and kind person. He always be there for me. All I can say is he is too kind for me. But, right after I heard those things, never thought that he could do something like that. Now, what are words actually if you don't mean it. I'm just disappoint with his attitude. I prefer his old character. The one that first time that I knew him. 

People said, "Past is past. Now, move forward." 

Badai pasti berlalu. Sememangnya doa mengubah segala sesuatu :') Kini, biarlah aku memiliki hati sebagai hamba. Ya Bapa, ku mohon pengampunan daripada Engkau. Aku tahu dosa ku. Tapi kini, Bapa, ku ingin Engkau lepaskanlah aku dari segalanya. Biarlah orang mengata, hatiku akan sentiasa tenang jika bersama Engkau. Hanya Engkau yang mengetahui akan segala hal. Ya Bapa, aku tak akan berharap apa-apa lagi. Jija iya diperkenankan oleh Engkau, Ya Bapa, maka terjadilah segala kehendak Engkau. Kerna Engkaulah Juruslamatku, Amen. 

Jadikan Aku Terang, ya Bapa. I'm really need you. Let the memories just a memories. Cry no more :')

You know the best among the BEST. I will always pray for him to understand something more better :) He's the best. Won't forget it. He is the past, so now I need to look forward for my future. But, i still mark my words :)

May God bless you and your family.